Saturday, July 27, 2013

Wow, I can't believe it's been almost a year since my last post. I have neglected my blog and as always when I neglect my blog I feel guilty. Writing in here is the only writing I can really have. Whether creative or just to let out some sort of steam. Clicking on the "create a post icon" made me feel excited.

My son will be starting kindergarten next month. I can't believe he is five and half years old already. And he lost his bottom tooth already, and his other one is loose. My little chimuelo.

I completed my first year as a preschool teacher. My students range from 24 to 36 months. I feel weird saying I'm a teacher to two year olds... they really don't need the classic teacher you think about. So I'm not the classic teacher. At least I don't feel like I am, although technically I am.  I'm a developmental teacher. I have the youngest children that can be permitted to be preschool age. It is very challenging but very rewarding. They are sweet, and have much to learn. They require so much patience and kindness, with just a hint of firmness. They know what they want and that's all they know; very egocentric.

I will still be at the preschool at least another year.

I am still wanting to move to the other side of the country. It's a scary feeling. I think about my son. Is it selfish to move my son (who has his whole family-- not to mention mine) out of here. I would like my son to have a different growing up life experience from mine, but I don't want him to be detached from the family. I am planning on coming back for summers and Christmas though.

I am used to the city. I don't like the city for its pollution and lack of greenery. There are places I know... but I want more. More more. I don't want to be stuck here.

I want to take a leap, a nice and good leap, a leap that makes me feel scared but excited for the possibilities. The rush from the city makes me feel stressed and on edge, even walking I can't hear my thoughts or have a conversation with my son. I'm straining to hear him over the sounds of the rushing cars. I bend down to hear him. Sometimes he thinks I'm ignoring him because I can't hear him. I want some peace. I want to slow down. I want my green nature. And I want a change. Like I said: a scary but exciting leap.