Wednesday, October 27, 2010

work... dreams... writing

Hello there, I hope everyone is breathing and eating well.

It has been very busy for me these past couple of months. I was able to get a job finally, at a preschool, it's not full time but right now I will take anything. I enjoy being with little ones so much. It just saddens me that I cannot put my own son in there. It is a privately owned preschool and thus too expensive. Every single day I am there I think about my son. The children are around his age, they run around in circles for no reason at all, they squeal out of delight, and they are so terribly adorable. I hope I am able to find a school for him soon, he is almost three and is finally potty trained, so I should have no trouble in finding a place I'm sure, just have to make sure it is close to home or the preschool.

These past two weeks I have been waking up tired, and feeling like I didn't get enough sleep. Sometimes some part of my body's muscle aches. I don't know whether I'm right or not, but I attribute it to my nightmares/dreams. Every single night I have been having strange dreams, some are night mares. Some are a continuation of other dreams I've had before, dreams of dreaming, conscious of dreaming, and others are just never ending loops where I redo a day over and over again. I die, then wake up and have to find a way to "escape" soemthing, and then I end up dying, and then I have to redo it again. What frustrates me is not being able to vividly remember my dreams. I remember when I wake up, but then it goes away.

It has been so long since I've written anything, here or anywhere else. I hate that. I am disapointed in myself because I love to write! But the job, the classes, and my little one keeps me so busy! Also, my laptop broke down on me about three months ago. Yikes. Now I will be able to finally get it fixed. I am currently using my sisters laptop- who lent it to me for an assignment I had to do. Which is done. Now it is time to sleep. I hope I will be able to keep this up for at least once a week. I hate not writing in here. Sometimes I write in my notebook but it is a little different because my handwriting is not as fast as my typing and my thoughts run so fast i can't keep up, typing is just easier for me.

Okay, that is all for now. Time to sleep. Oh gosh, excuse my spelling and grammer.